Spoken Word # 3: To be Someone Like You

I’ve found what I was always looking for and I couldn’t be any happier. I learned and became a changed man. I just didn’t imagine there would be blood, so much blood…

A Spoken Word be Someone Like You

composed by: Christian Foremost

I don’t trust words

We toss that ball around

in the field we play

And, I know every aspect of the game now

I know what I need

I know what to expect

I know how to get what I want

Everybody’s got their own tricks

Lies, flattery, false promises

Name it

Mine on the other hand are

truth, vulnerability and understanding

Risky offense and very weak defense

But indeed, very effective

I can spin my words like webs,

beautifully crafted to lure in my prey

Don’t judge me

Everybody else does this

Been caught and left to die a bunch of times

But I always fix myself up,

Crawl right back and design my web better

I used to believe that every person is different

You have to get to know a person

Give him a chance,

and then you’ll see something you’ll like

There’s tons of fish in the sea, they say

Well I’ve cast a whole net in

and what I’ve got all bite

So yeah all men are jerks

and I guess so am I

~~~~~~~

The catch was plentiful that day

You didn’t really stand out

I was gonna cast you off

The minute you didn’t respond

I was just being nice and playing along

Matching your energy

and mimicking your words

But I don’t know,

you somehow reeled me in

You used words that were so captivating

I stayed longer until I didn’t feel like leaving anymore

You just had the most fascinating mind

If I looked inside, I feel like there’s an endless abyss

Filled with knowledge that you’ll never be tired to consume

The way you saw the world was so new to me

People are struggling and fighting for their cause every single day

The world doesn’t just revolve around one life

Privilege was what you called it

How I couldn’t see just beyond my own problems

And, you were right

You thought in a way that showed you cared

And you’re a warrior ready to face the battles ahead,

even with your own life on the line

I admired that bravery of yours

I couldn’t help but think

“How could I be someone like you?”

We can talk about everything

and there was no boundary in sight

You opened up my mind

and broke the limits I thought were there

You would listen to everything I said

like you could never get enough

You showed me your scars and I showed you mine

Never any judgement,

just fascination

Everything was possible with you

I went along with every idea you had

Always surprised on how I can keep up

Of course you were always right,

but I always had a point to prove

You liked how I always kept you on your toes

Never knowing what’s going on in my mind

Can never be sure what to expect, huh?

But it was always one hell of a ride

I couldn’t believe how lucky I was

Everything I needed, you had

Everything I wanted, you gave and more

Check, check, check

We did everything we felt like doing

I followed wherever you went

Opened up my entire life

I could give you everything you wanted

just not my heart

It’s not that I didn’t want to

If I closed my eyes and kept quiet,

Pretended to be a better person than I actually am,

You would still be here

And we would be so happy together

Maybe you should have listened

When I told you I was selfish

You should have ran right away

When I told you I didn’t care about anyone else

You should have seen the signs

When I was a different person every day

Even when I unleashed all my demons to you

You stood your ground

And held me tight

While I was raising a knife aimed at your back

You understand you said, because you were like me

From that I learned that you’re weak

I never stopped playing the game

I was greedy and with you I was always winning

I scored goals I never could before

I can see it now, victories mine to claim

In my delusional head

I thought I was giving you a chance

They said I was using you

How can that be?

I’m not that kind of person, right?

I was happy with you

But I still did not have feelings for you

You fit perfectly well in my life

But I’m not interested to learn about yours

I’m excited about all our plans together

But I don’t see a future of us at all

Guilt is what I felt

I wanted to get rid of it

So I gave you a bright day you’ll never forget

Then I plunged my knife down your back

I never lie

I keep all my promises

I will never ghost you like they did me

I saw that through

It was my truth that killed you in the end

You were waiting with open arms expecting an embrace

My words cut through your chest until it was open

I didn’t care about you even at our last moment

I showed no mercy, stabbing you anywhere else I could

I only wanted to cleanse myself

The truth will set you free

And it did

I did the right thing

I was smiling, victorious

Blood on my hands

I freaking did it

I finally won

In this arena of deceit and manipulation

Players running towards and away from each other

Nothing but a bunch of losers with nowhere to go

I have proven to be different

I beat the game with a nameless dead body at my feet

I always get what I want in the end

No one can dare stop me

My reflection stares back from the blade of my knife

Still smiling, happy as I meant to be

Do you like what you see?

~~~~~~~

Epilogue

A creature appears in the shadows

My demon in its truest form

You were always just there hiding, huh?

I’ve been waiting for you

Reaching out a hand for me to follow

I gave my knife instead

No. I will not go.

What I did and who I was

Is not who I want to be

I would rather suffer the torment of my deeds

And not give in and claim to be the man you of me

Alone is what I deserve to feel

Just leave me be

and I’ll decide from here

THE END OF A SPOKEN WORD TRILOGY

Disclaimer : This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

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